i'm hanging in there

[JACK]

hey people....i'm hanging in there but its coming dangerously close to looking like i wont have much soon.

mental illness is getting the better of me lately...i came on this forum hoping maybe someone could maybe....i dunno...just say something i need to hear i guess.

theres one option i have left...my fingers are crossed and i'm looking up to the sky for a bit of help....

if i end up on the street its gonna break my heart....dont mean to sound stupid but sometimes i wonder if theres more dignity in being in jail than living on the street.

i dont think i could handle the cold.

i'm just so angry i cant seem to talk any sense.

does anyone know what jail is like?....do ya have to fight all the time?...is it less scary than being on the street?

[Dominic]

There are a lot of great people in this forum who will talk with you about life on the streets, life in jail, mental illness... anything else you want to.

Firstly welcome!

What you need to hear? Let's start with 'there is one option I have left' I'm not sure that that is the case.

You are welcome to share what you are angry about, any fears you have, any grief you are experiencing... anything you want.

You are in great company in this forum if you want to discuss brokenness and people will treat you with respect.

[dooshka]

Originally Posted by JACK

does anyone know what jail is like?....do ya have to fight all the time?...is it less scary than being on the street?

I do and believe me you don't want to go there.What people say does happen,not to everyone but it deffinately happens. What i have seen in there would blow your mind. Seriously you don't want that .

Its not the fighting you want to worry about its the shiving and rapes and the fact that there is no escape from anyone. Say one thing wrong it could be your life.

[hailz]

Hey Jack... *hugs*

Take a deep breath...

You will always have something in life- and that is your life. You have to take care of it...

The sky isn't going to help you- but there are so many people out there willing to listen and help you through it. The thing beating in your chest, and the control beneath that skull is keeping you floating... it will help you through- just let it.

You don't have end up on the streets- there are plenty of places out there that will help you. It will be a struggle- I'm not denying that. But life is a struggle... can you imagine how boring it would be if it wasn't?

You don't want to go to jail- as Dooshka says... it is basically a lot of what the movies show you. If you are in any sort of trouble- there are people there for you.. to help you.

You might not be feeling very important to yourself right now- but I am sure, you are very important to someone else out there. You need to hold your head high buddy, and aim for the stars. If you can't reach those stars you can only fall back into the heavens...

Be positive. Things will work out.

[Steel Butterfly]

Hi Jack,

Welcome to the forums, and I'm very sorry that you are feeling bad at the moment.

You say that you only have "one option left" - but I'm sure that you have many paths open to you, all of which include living, and surviving through this bad patch in your life, so hang in there.

You do not say what, specifically, is putting you in a position where you are considering street life, but please, as long as you have housing, please do your best to hang onto it! Street life carries a lot of emotional baggage, and can actually cause mental health issues in many people - and so I'm sure it would only exacerbate your existing problems. In addition, homeless people with mental health issues are not treated well by the system. I remember one particular homeless bloke I knew who had severe mental health problems and learning difficulties, who used to get drunk and would then try and harm himself by throwing himself at walls, punching through glass, hitting himself, etc - the police would arrest him, keep him in overnight for drunken disorderly, and as he hadn't been in the country long enough to get a hostel, they would then just kick him back out onto the streets again once he'd sobered up.

And Jack, I would also like to urge you to listen to what Dooshka and Hailz have said about prison; although I've never been there myself, I have known people who have, and believe me, that's really not an option for you either.

Do you have somebody helping you - i.e., somebody professional - with your mental health issues?

You have definitely found have people, in these forums, who have "been there", and who care and want to help you. If there's anything you want to talk about, we'll be listening.

Hope to hear back from you soon.

[beatonthestreet]

Howya Jack!
Welcome and I hope you hang around the forums, as Dominic says theres some really cool people about here, who know where you are coming from...

keep good matey..

[whitchhh]

Hi Jack

I really strongly advise sticking with these forums, they really are great and the people here are just amazing.
It sounds like you just need a little guidance, someone to help you and believe in you when the times get tough! These forums are where you can find that little something extra, that little something that you need someone to say to make you feel like you are worth something, because no matter how close you are to losing everything, as long as you are who you are, thats all that matters.
dont just cross your fingers that the thing that you need to happen in order to fix things happens, get out there and MAKE SURE IT HAPPENS! think positive, its the first step towards a healthier mind.
and nothing you say on these forums sounds stupid. because i dont think that there is one thing that you could type that another person hasnt done or thought about, or even thought of doing.
i may not know you, but i still care, and if you can just stay strong and remember that even though you may feel like you have lost everything, the forums are here and all these people are just waiting to help you, and as long as you have that, you still have something

[mrvdv85]

Hi
As being a prisoner for offences that I surely do regret, jail isnt what it seems on tv but it also depends on what jail you have gone to... I notice the difference between a privately own jail and a actual maximum jail. but i have those days where i prefer jail than being out in the cold

I was looking for this the other day. i dont usually post in forums but i wanted to say thank you!